CGM – Vol 1 Chapter 3 Part 4 – The shut-in baits others to take it easy

After subjugating the Kraken, we swiftly returned to the guild, [Cosmic Falcon].

We conquered an A-rank quest so I thought I’d be treated like a hero in the guild.

However, things turned out differently from what I imagined.

The moment we entered the guild, all eyes were on us. It was an unpleasant atmosphere, filled with disdain.

“Hey, everyone! Nii-chan and his friend are back!” (Guild member)

—Followed by loud laughter.

“Hahaha! What’s wrong? You’re back pretty early. Thinking of changing quests? That’d be a smarter move. Gyahaha!” (Guild member)

The burly men erupted into a chorus of laughter like a bunch of frogs, making an annoyingly loud and unbearable noise. It was downright noisy and irritating.

Dealing with a loud burst of noise for a shut-in like me can be exhausting and overwhelming, so I wished they would stop.

“If you’re talking about the quest, we cleared it properly!” (Sofia)

Amidst the chaos, Sofia’s female voice smoothly entered the mix. For a moment, the laughter came to an abrupt halt. However, it lasted only a moment.

“Hahaha! I see, I see! It’s not even an A-rank quest, right? You took on lower-ranked quests as a cover-up, didn’t you? Hahaha!” (Member)

“We cleared an A-rank quest, you know?” (Sofia)

It’s no use. Nobody seems to be listening. They’re laughing loudly, making fun of us with their nearby friends.

Sofia seemed annoyed, but well, it’s okay to let them laugh. After all, we could soon present the proof.

We arrived at the guild counter.

Guild Master Clara Voyager was elegantly sipping tea with her pinky finger raised on the other side of the counter. She was seated in an incredibly comfortable-looking chair. As expected of a top guild master.

Clara seemed to be engrossed in some paperwork, as there were stacks of papers spread out on the counter.

“Oh, welcome back. You’re back quite early, aren’t you?” (Clara)

Clara swiftly tidied up the papers and leisurely stood up, looking down at us with a mocking smile, despite being shorter than me.

The guild members were ready to burst into laughter, sensing that I might say something stupid.

Too bad for them; they were the real fools.

“We cleared the quest. Give us our reward.” (Wilhelm)

“It was super easy!” (Sofia)

Sofia opened the quest logbook on the counter, where the results were automatically recorded by magic.

Of course, the result was “Quest Completed”.

“…Let me confirm this. Ara? Ara ara ara? Wait, what is the meaning of this!” (Clara)

Clara lifted the quest logbook and scrutinized1 it intensely, repeatedly checking it.

After a thorough examination, she raised her head, looking as if she’s about to collapse from shock.

“You… have indeed defeated the Kraken…” (Clara)

“Gyahahahahaha! See, they couldn’t defeat the Kraken after all… Huh? What? Miss (ojou), what did you say just now?” (Guild member)

“They have defeated the Kraken. Without a doubt.” (Clara)

“Huh? Th-that’s absurd. Ojou, the Kraken is a monster of legends. It devours people, swallows entire whales, and if it gets hungry, it might even devour a small island. Any sensible person wouldn’t even dare to approach such a terrifying creature!” (Guild member)

Clara checked the quest logbook once again.

“We really did defeat it. I can hardly believe it myself.”

A somber silence fell within the guild.

No one was laughing anymore.

On the contrary, the atmosphere had turned uneasy. They must have realized how stupid they looked after mocking others.

“Um… may I inquire about something?” (Clara)

“Oh, sure, go ahead.” (Wilhelm)

“According to this achievement report, it states that the Kraken has been defeated, and furthermore, it mentions the delivery of the Kraken…?” (Clara)

*whispers… whispers…*

A hushed exchange filled with disbelief started around us. Mentions of it being impossible can be heard… But it was indeed possible.

“Oh, that. Yeah, since a request for the Kraken itself was stated, I brought it back. I’d like the guild to buy it.” (Wilhelm)

“Brought it back…? But where is the creature? Did you bring back even a single leg?” (Clara)

“No, I brought back the whole thing. The entire body is intact. It’s just that it was too big to fit inside the guild.” (Wilhelm)

Sofia ran outside the guild and quickly returned, dragging one of the Kraken’s legs. Well, even that single leg couldn’t fit through the entrance.

“Here it is! It won’t fit inside, but this is the Kraken’s leg. Wil-kun is currently floating it with his magic.” (Sofia)

Several burly men went outside. Soon after, they let out screams that sounded like a mixture of shock and terror. It seemed they were utterly stunned by the immense size of the Kraken.

Seriously, it’s about the size of a small island. And here it is, levitated in the sky by my magic. Seeing it out of the blue would certainly be a shocker.

By the way, the outcry in the town was quite something after we brought it back. There were even newspaper reporters following us along the way. 

According to them, there’s a legend that Kraken is incredibly delicious. We got into a lively discussion about how exciting it would be if it could be eaten.

“How about it? Will you buy it?” (Sofia)

“Well, I’m surprised. The purchase price is 50,000 gold2.” (Clara)

“That’s a huge amount of food we can buy~ but can you add a bit more color to the deal?” (Sofia)

“Well, that… It’s something the client decides.” (Clara)

Fair enough. After deducting the commission fee, we ended up with a neat 150,000 gold. This should be good news for Anya.

“Wil-kun, we did it!” (Sofia)

“Yes, and thanks for your hard work, Sofia-san.” (Wilhelm)

I gave Sofia a high-five with my right hand. As we were celebrating, Sofia’s breasts bounced up and down joyfully. It was a delightful bounce.

Now, let’s give them a little taste of their own medicine.

I glanced around at the burly guild members in the guild. With confidence, I gave them a smug look.

“So? I wonder who said we couldn’t clear the quest?” (Wilhelm)

Silence. No one answered.

“Didn’t some of you even offer the kind advice to switch to another quest?” (Wilhelm)

Everyone seemed to avert their gaze from me. Some even hung their heads low.

“Oi oi, why the silence? This quest you all abandoned months ago. We kindly went and completed it for you, didn’t we? Instead, shouldn’t you be asking yourselves why you left it unattended for so long? Or could it be that members of this guild are incapable of even completing quests of this level?” (Wilhelm)

The silence was deafening.

The burly men all seemed to sweat profusely, their ears turning red from the uncomfortable silence.

Hehehe, no one’s saying anything, huh? Can’t blame them. They’ve got no right to do so. These big guys even look smaller than me right now.

They may have ridiculed and laughed at me, but at least I feel a bit relieved now.

If they’ve learned their lesson, they better not mess with members of the [Grand Bahamut] Guild again. Otherwise, they’ll end up embarrassing themselves even more.

But seriously, these guys aren’t saying anything at all.

“Hey, what’s the matter? How about saying something? Are your mouths just for show?” (Wilhelm)

Everyone trembled, lips pressed tightly in frustration. Some clenched their fists, but not a single word was uttered.

They’re probably reflecting on their own foolishness and stupidity. It must be spinning in their heads right now.

Pathetic. It was way too early for them to pick a fight with someone as exceptional as me.

Well, that’s enough of that. I gave them a gentlemanly smile.

“Well, I guess that’s enough teasing. Let’s get along a bit better from now on. We successfully defeated the Kraken. Everyone can now enjoy the summer beach without worries. Feel free to play in the sea as much as you want.” (Wilhelm)

I’ll play nice just a bit.

And then, those burly men looked at me brightly all at once.

Wow, what simpletons. It’s written all over their faces.

“Nahahaahaha! Hey, you’re a good guy! Let’s be buddies, bro!” (Guild member)

“Bro, you’re amazing! Honestly, I believed in you all along!” (Guild member)

“Quit lying, you’re the one who used to make fun of them the most. But you know, secretly, I’ve been wishing for your success, bro.” (Guild member)

“That’s a lie, too! Gyahahaha! But who cares about all that now? Let’s eat the Kraken. We’re having a feast tonight boys! Get the booze ready!” (Guild member)

They’re quite a cheerful bunch now. 

“W-Wait a minute! The Kraken is the delivery item desu wa. We have to transport it to the town hall for our client. Touching it is strictly prohibited!” (Clara)

Nobody paid attention to Clara’s words.

By the way, even with dozens of burly men from [Cosmic Falcon], they couldn’t transport the Kraken. So, I took care of the transportation. Seriously, what a bunch of simpletons, and they’re such a handful.

Night falls, and I find myself in the town’s main square. 

People from all walks of life are gathered here, from commoners to nobles and even members of the royal family.

The reason is simple: the town is providing Kraken dishes free of charge. Apparently, they mobilized all the town’s chefs to cook for this occasion.

The legendary Kraken being defeated became the big talk in town. Even with little advertising, the news became so widespread that people gathered in numbers beyond belief.

The Kraken is huge. Even with thousands of people, it would be impossible to finish it all.

Any leftovers will be dried or smoked, and the town will take responsibility for storing them until winter. Looks like we won’t have to worry about food this winter.

Anya, being careful not to burn herself, took a cute bite of the Kraken.

“Wil-sama, this grilled kraken (kraken-yaki) is incredibly delicious.” (Anya)

It’s a simple skewered Kraken legs dish, seasoned with salt and pepper, and grilled. Simple but delicious.

“Oh, seriously, it’s amazing~ The flavor is rich, the saltiness is perfect, and it has a nice depth. This goes really well with grape juice.” (Wilhelm)

“Yes. Let’s also bring some as a souvenir for Mew-chan.” (Anya)

I’m sure she’ll be thrilled.

In reality, Anya wanted to bring Mew-chan along, but bringing such a magical beast would likely be troublesome, so she decided to keep her at home. Right now, she’s probably lonely, guarding the [Grand Bahamut] guild.

“Anya, let’s go get some soup next.” (Wilhelm)

“Yes, I’d also like to try the steak.” (Anya)

There are also various other dishes lined up, including pasta, fried foods, salad, and even bread as side dishes. 

Everything looks delicious, and the people in the town are happily enjoying the feast.

It’s incredibly lively, and even though it’s nighttime, the town seems so bright. It feels like a festival.

As a shut-in, a place like this would be exhausting to be in. I feel a bit overwhelmed by all the people here.

But still… somehow, it’s fun.

My mood naturally lifts. Knowing that I was the one who created this lively atmosphere makes me feel proud.

Today, I decided to eat to my heart’s content without holding back. After all, it was none other than me who brought back the Kraken.

“Ah, it’s Clara-chan. She’s a friend of mine who’s the same age as me.” (Anya)

Indeed, I could see Clara from [Cosmic Falcon] in the distance.

She’s wearing different clothes from earlier in the day. This time, it’s a black gothic lolita dress.

“Does she always dress like that?” (Wilhelm)

“Yes. It’s cute, isn’t it?” (Anya)

“Well, yeah.” (Wilhelm)

From a distance, she looks as cute as a doll. However, she doesn’t quite exude the same guild master vibe.

Clara spotted us from a distance and started approaching us while Anya waved at her happily.

“Hmph, you’re acting as familiar as always.” (Clara)

“Of course. We’re friends after all.” (Anya)

“We’re not friends, we’re ri-v-al-s. We’re in the same business and we’re no longer children, so please don’t get too overly familiar.” (Clara)

“Hehe, Clara-chan, you’re really cute today.” (Anya)

“This girl hasn’t heard a thing. Well, whatever. How’s the business going, Anastasia? Is [Grand Bahamut] still standing?”

Straight to the point, as always.

It pierced through Anya, and me, and also happened to stab Sofia-san who was passing by.

“I-It’s totally fine. Thanks for worrying.” (Anya)

Lies. If you two are friends, she should just be honest about it.

Clara sighed in exasperation.

“Sofia-san and Wilhelm-sama came to my guild to look for quests, so there’s no way business is okay over there.” (Clara)

“Ugh… B-but it’s okay, really.” (Anya)

“Anastasia, I have a suggestion. Why don’t you put up the [Cosmic Falcon]’s sign at your place? That way, any requests that come to us, I can easily hand them over to you3.”

“I’m sorry. That’s a no. My home is [Grand Bahamut], it’s a guild I’ve cherished alongside my father. That’s something I can’t change.” (Anya)

“Then, may I at least have him?” (Clara)

Ah. Clara suddenly entwined her arm with mine and stuck to me as if we were a couple.

“Wilhelm Wondersky-sama is a very capable guild member. I’d love to have you work with us.” (Clara)

“No.” (Anya)

Clara smiled mischievously.

“Oh, why is that? [Cosmic Falcon] has far more quests than [Grand Bahamut], and there will be plenty of challenging and exciting tasks for Wilhelm-sama. If that’s the case, isn’t there no reason for him to stay with [Grand Bahamut]?” (Clara)

No, I’m a shut-in, so even if there are heaps of quests, I won’t do them. I have no desire to challenge myself either, and I don’t need any extra excitement in my life. All I ever want is a bed to retreat to.

Also, I owe Anya for her delicious meals, while I owe Clara nothing. That’s why there’s no reason for me to work at [Cosmic Falcon].

Anya looked embarrassed at her comment. Not frustrated, but embarrassed.

“What do you think, Anastasia? Any response?” (Clara)

“W-Well, you see, Wil-sama is, um, eventually going to be… my husband, so…” (Anya)

Ha?” (Clara)

Clara froze in response.

“Could you please say that one more time?” (Clara)

“U-um, Wil-sama will become my husband. He’s going to be my future spouse. I’ve already received approval from her father, Uncle Robert (Robert oji-san). That’s why, I can’t hand him over to [Cosmic Falcon]!” (Anya)

“Eeehhhhhhhhh? That’s not acceptable at all! No matter how outstanding of a guild member he is, his appearance is not so impressive!” (Clara)

Oi! The person in question is right next to you. You just wounded my delicate heart.

“Anastasia, there are plenty of more handsome men out there than him. I’ll choose for you, so please reconsider.” (Clara)

“Clara-chan, there’s no man more handsome than Wil-sama in this world, you know?” (Anya)

“Your eyes seem to be malfunctioning. Is there an eye doctor nearby?” (Clara)

“Oh come on, what are you saying? My eyes are perfectly fine.” (Anya)

“But, still…” (Clara)

Clara glanced at me for a moment.

Her face turned uninterested.

“Isn’t the Kraken much more handsome?” (Clara)

Hey, come on! Saying I’m lower than a monster really cuts me deep, you know? I feel like hiding away for a month now.

Anya turned to look at my face and when she did… her face turned bright red.

It was the face of a maiden-in-love. So cute.

“Obviously, Wil-sama is overwhelmingly more handsome than the Kraken.” (Anya)

Clara glanced at my face again, her eyes seeming uninterested.

“I… don’t… see… it. Anastasia, do you even realize that you’re a beautiful young lady? Marrying such a dull man doesn’t suit you. I can’t sincerely bless you for such a thing. Why do you have that look of a maiden-in-love? Please reconsider this quickly—” (Clara)

However, Anya didn’t change her mind.

To think that she cares so much about me. It made me feel proud.

The town is more lively than ever.

There’s an abundance of food and even alcohol is being served.

Ah, what a wonderful night it turned out to be.

There was a booming sound as if fireworks were being launched in the distance.

No, my intuition tells me that was a sound produced by nature.

After a while, there was a noise like small stones hitting the roof, scattered and bouncing.

Anya was in the bath. Mew-chan was sitting on the sofa, reading a newspaper, so I decided to ask her.

“Hey, what was that noise just now?” (Wilhelm)

“Huh? Probably an underwater volcano eruption mew. Happens quite often mew. Well, wouldn’t expect a NEET to know, huh?” (Mew-chan)

He turned to me with a teasing expression so I returned a silly face.

“Hehe, that’s quite an amusing expression you’ve got there mew.” (Mew-chan)

Since she laughed, I guess I won. Mew-chan neatly folded the newspaper and placed it beside the sofa. She seemed to have a serious expression.

“Hey, NEET.” (Mew-chan)

“What’s up? You look serious.” (Wilhelm)

“It’s about the Kraken.” (Mew-chan)

“How was it? Delicious?” (Wilhelm)

“Soda-ne! It was really delicious mew. It had an amazingly rich flavor!” (Mew-chan)

It seemed she enjoyed the souvenir that Anya and I brought back. That’s a relief.

“But that’s not it mew. I was wondering why the Kraken was on the beach mew.” (Mew-chan)

“Maybe it came looking for food?” (Wilhelm)

“If that were the reason, it wouldn’t stay on the same beach for months mew. There must be another reason mew.” (Mew-chan)

I see. I hadn’t thought about that. Mew-chan’s point was indeed something to question.

“The Kraken is originally a magical beast that resides in the deep sea. There must be a reason it couldn’t stay in its usual place mew.” (Mew-chan)

“And that reason is the underwater volcano…?” (Wilhelm)

“So that’s it. But the Kraken should know the location of the volcano mew. If that’s the case, it could have avoided the danger by changing its resting place. Yet, it chose to come near to the surface. That suggests there might have been another reason mew.” (Mew-chan)

“…Could it have been in danger of being preyed upon?” (Wilhelm)

“That’s right mew. There’s a significant possibility that there was something suspicious happening underwater.” (Mew-chan)

Seriously? Something might still happen.

It seems like the underwater volcano erupted again.

A creature capable of preying on the Kraken. What kind of monster could that be?

Due to the impact of the underwater volcano, a small earthquake occurred.

Both Mew-chan and I felt a strong sense of unease.

TL Notes:

Thanks for reading!

Tbh, I’m quite surprised that Clara actually does her work. I thought she was just the figurehead who keeps going ‘oh-hoho’ but apparently everyone around that age works properly.

Maybe the earthquake is caused by Kyogre and Groudon fighting each other. What was their mythological counterparts again? Leviathan and Behemoth, right?

Also, I don’t think mew-chan has a gender so I sometimes alternate between he and she cause I forgot which one I used.


  1. Scrutinize means examine or inspect closely and thoroughly.
  2. Tbh I don’t really get this, but my guess is that the guild pays for it and pass it to the client, then once accepted they give you the client’s reward.
  3. I think this is a roundabout way of trying to acquire [Grand Bahamut]. Either that or she allowed them to use the [Cosmic Falcon] brand for their own business.
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